living

Since we were in boat transit, we missed the news of Captain Phil Harris' death until a week later. Yesterday the Discovery Channel had a Deadliest Catch marathon in his honor. I found it a perfect tribute to this salty man. Captain Phil stood out to me on the show in his closeness to his sons, Josh and Jake. Mike Rowe (the voice-over for Deadliest Catch) captured Phil's spirit in his own way here.

In another genre completely, in the movie The Hours, there is a line by Virginia Woolf:

Someone has to die in order that the rest of us should value life more. It's contrast.

Virginia is telling her husband why she must kill off one of the main characters in her novel, Mrs. Dalloway. To me, that line is the epitome of the entire movie. The Hours has a dark feeling to me, yet it is one of my favorite movies in its portrayal of life via death.

Death, at first glance, always appears to be a morbid topic. The Hours artfully captured the sentience of life through the exploration of death. Those who know me know that death has touched me closely. I wouldn't be the person I am without experiencing the death of people I loved. I am grateful for whatever understanding of death I have gleaned from saying goodbye to first my brother in 1998, then my father in 2007, then my dear life-loving and joyful grandmother in 2009.


When my dad was diagnosed with cancer in 2006, he told my mom that he had no regrets, and that he'd lived a full life. He was 54 years old. I took his statement to heart. He had lived a full life. He knew how to have fun with his life. He worked damn hard (I mean really, REALLY hard), but he also was an expert at seizing opportunities. His death hit me profoundly.

It was not long after Dad died in early 2007 that Scott and I began planning our sailing trip to Alaska. To me that trip was somewhat in honor of Dad and the risks he had taken, the full life he had lived, and the dignity he held in death. 55 years is not much time to have on this Earth. 55 years does not leave time for retirement. 55 years does not allow time for "later." And none of us is even guaranteed 55 years to fit in as much life as possible. Captain Phil died last week when he was 53. No one could accuse him of doing anything less than living every moment he had as well.

I honor those who have gone before me for the gift of perspective and the lessons in living. It is tragic that others must die in order for the rest of us to value life more. It would be a greater tragedy if the value of death were lost on us.